PSL W LIGHTNEN (prolly renamed later)

[it had been a long time since Gon had seen Killua in person.

or, maybe not. maybe that was actually kind of relative—maybe a year wasn't a long time for a lot of people, but for Gon, every day felt like a week. Gon kept his complaints to himself about this, especially initially—it was Gon's first time really facing and accepting major consequences for his hubris, because he'd hurt Killua (among other problematic things).

at first, that was when time stretched on the longest—Gon was still unstable, finding himself thrashing in cold sweats out of terrible dreams, or buckling with a hard clench to his jaw to fail choking back frustrated tears... all with the irrational, not-distant-enough fear that he'd maybe really screwed up for good.

with time, however, and talking to Mito about things indirectly—and Ging, surprisingly, a bit more directly—Gon finally found himself getting his footing again. there was still a certain chip on his shoulder that was a mite self loathing, and it seemed like he had some trouble exercising rational caution without seeming insecure... but more and more, Gon was feeling like himself again.

though he wasn't sure about his friendship with Killua—it of course wasn't ruined; it was a bond much stronger than even the terrible things they'd endured, and Gon was confident of that. they still texted, and talked on the phone sometimes (though that took several months to warm to), but something still felt... a little stilted. Gon didn't want to inquire, even if his gut instinct screamed at him to just simply, bluntly address it—he had to be more careful than that. if Killua wanted to tell him whatever he was hiding, then... Gon would just have to wait for that, instead of disrupting the mending bridge.

shortly after returning to Whale Island, as Gon waded through the corners of his mind that he'd had no idea could be so dark and terrible, Gon had reflected on the possibility of losing Killua—which in retrospect, was sort of embarrassing. and maybe insulting. but looking back on things, before NGL, even as Gon came back into some emotional clarity, there was a particular yearning. for Killua's trust, of course, but so too his voice; his nearness; his scent.

with some mortification, Gon began to realize that he may have been somewhat infatuated with Killua. more disturbing, Gon then was uncertain if his moment of realization was anywhere near the dawn of those actual feelings—he felt like it might have been there all along, waiting to be contextualized. that was a few months ago.

it's a lot to carry around, even for a year—even as Gon busies himself happily with assisting Kite on expeditions, as he is currently, running errands. despite how much Gon misses Killua, he isn't sure if today is the day he's ready to see him—and Gon only has that thought when he catches a shock of white, distant and almost eye-level. the silhouette of two people. and for all his anxieties, he'd be crazy to not react.

so Gon grips the bag in his hands, then charges forward, stopping after a few dashed steps in hesitation. is it really—?

Gon drops the bag, shelling his hands around his mouth with excitement.]

Killua—!!! Alluka-cha—n!

[after that bellow, Gon gives a frenetic wave, for good measure, leaned up onto the balls of his feet. good thing he's now too jazzed to worry!]